Chuay Duay !!! Riak tam-rut Nawy !!!!!

I was reading the Bangkok Post last night which had an interesting tidbit about burglaries committed in Bangkok. Apparently ninety percent of them are committed by either Junkies, Friends or family of the victim, or construction workers from nearby sites.
As far as Thai police go they are working on incorporating some sophisticated European and American detection techniques to increase the amount of these cases they solve.

That just leaves me.

I've probably neglected to mention this but the "Hotel" I'm staying in is a construction site of sorts.The drilling begins at around 6am and just keeps on trucking until about Midnight. The noise does not really bother me too much, but this new piece of information provided by the Bangkok Post has given me cause for concern. There are construction workers in my building right now. I can hear them. RIGHT NOW.
The polite whispers of fellow guest has become the malicious scheming of painters,electricians and apprentice painters and electricians.
Every slight sound outside my door finds me scuttling under my bed in fear of some browbeaten, underpaid Thai tradie come to claim my Ipod and tobacco or worse. My Organs Maybe? It does not bare thinking about. But that all I can do. Drink my cheap Thai rum and think.
So I've decided to take some precautions.
Ive have smashed an empty bottle of rum into sharp glass shards which I have lined at the entrance to my room. The assailant (Barefoot of course) will step on these which will give me time to grab my bag and rush past him.
I have also taught myself to say "Help! Call the police!!" in perfect Thai.
Chuay Duay !!! Riak tam-rut Nawy !!!!!
I have spent hours in front of the mirror rehearsing my lines, trying to perfect the tone.
Scared but not too scared.
Authoritative but with a hint resignation that shows I am willing to negotiate(Ipod Yes. Kidney No.)
This helps me sleep at night but I'm not sure how effective it will be.
So please if you don't hear from me over the next couple of days Chuay Duay !!! Riak tam-rut Nawy !!!!!
Chuay Duay !!! Riak tam-rut Nawy !!!!!
Oh god please help.